Reminder: This blog shares personal perspective and general information only. It is not medical advice. If you are in crisis, call or text 988.

Panic Disorder
& Anxiety

Short pieces on what panic disorder actually feels like — written from inside a 40-year career in emergency medicine. Not clinical guidance. Just honest reflection from someone who has been there.

What a Panic Attack
Actually Feels Like

Most descriptions I've read focus on the symptoms — racing heart, shortness of breath, dizziness. They're accurate, but they miss the thing that makes a panic attack unlike anything else: the absolute, unshakeable certainty that something is catastrophically wrong. Here's what it felt like from the inside.

"The symptoms are not the panic. The symptoms are what happens after the panic arrives. The panic itself is a feeling — one of the most primal feelings a human being can have."
— Scott Elberger, MD
Why panic attacks happen at the worst possible moments

The relationship between stress, sleep, and the timing of panic attacks — and why the body sometimes picks the moments when you can least afford it.

What helped me — and what didn't

Forty years of trial and error, from the strategies that made things worse to the ones that eventually made a difference. Including EMDR.

The difference between anxiety and panic disorder

Everyone gets anxious. Not everyone has panic disorder. Here's how I'd explain the distinction — as both a physician and a patient.

Telling people — or not

The calculus of disclosure. Who to tell, when, and what I learned from the times I stayed silent when I shouldn't have.

On EMDR — what it is and what it did

I was skeptical. I was also, at 43, finally ready to try something different. A personal account of EMDR therapy and why it worked when other things hadn't.

About the Author
Scott Elberger
MD · MPH · Emergency Physician · Author

Scott Elberger practiced emergency medicine on Long Island for over forty years while privately managing panic disorder. Fear Itself is his memoir. This blog is an extension of that story — written for anyone who recognizes themselves in it.

Full biography →